This Burning

Summer has flown by. . .I'm finishing up my last summer of contract work with Nacel Open Door.  Aiden left for UGA weekend before this last- same weekend my 18 year old cat, Sarah, passed. . whew. .it's been a bit of a whirlwind but I'm all caught up from the two trips overseas with the extra work this summer.. plus a little extra $$ moving forward!  Africa and Asia still living with me as I continue to support Bright Nepal which feeds my need to be connected to the global movement to empower girls in poverty.

So here I am now FINALLY embarking on what I'm sure will be the biggest adventure to date: Goddesspell! I've been sitting, incubating this idea for a few years now and just a couple of months ago I went to hear Eve Ensler speak (of Vagina Monologue fame), quoting excerpts from her new book, Body of the World.  (She was also the one that created the One Billion Rising event that I was a part of this past Feb.( Rising UP!)  I talked with her briefly afterwards and gave her a Pacha Mama CD.  I feel like the divine spoke through her to me in terms of telling me that it's time. . time to begin the creation of this piece.  The idea of creating a musical really can feel overwhelming but I was guided/inspired from a couple different conversations this past month and came to understand that the first step would be me creating a promo CD and sort of a promo theatrical concert along with it.  And so, I fully committed to this project on July 18th and the completion of the first stage within 9 months- right around Easter- just before I go back to India/Nepal.

I already know that two of the last songs I have written will be part of this CD: "Earthsong" and "Women of the World".  This past month it has become VERY clear that I'm working on a song inspired by the energy of the Hindu goddess Kali, currently called This Burning.  I'm extremely excited about what is coming out of this inspiration. . I'm very passionate about it. ..it promises to be one of the most powerful pieces I've been inspired to create to date.

So this blog is now primarily going to be dedicated to this journey- the journey of Goddesspell.  My goal is to blog at least once a week.  Enjoy the ride with me!  "Like my Goddesspell facebook page for daily blurbs/pics/progress.  For more information you can also check out my website page.

The Fullness of the Full Moon

Have you felt it????  This weekend has been really powerful for me.  I find myself at a loss though when trying to describe in words what has moved through me.  I just feel the need mainly to share my gratitude for the grace. . .for the miracles.  .for the Divine present in my life.  Yesterday was the official full moon but they say the energy of it is powerful the day before and after (TODAY!).

Friday was our first official Pacha Mamas performance/sharing in our newest incarnation: myself, Marquetta and Anahata.  When I came home from my travels I was at peace with letting go of Pacha Mamas completely, but what I came to realize relatively quickly is that I was just being called to let go of the previous incarnation not the energy of what Pacha Mamas is and has always been for me- a creative outlet- a place to share my soul in some of the ways that feed my soul the most.  What I have let go of is what I think Pacha Mamas is suppose to look like- any attachment to Pacha Mama outcomes.  But I had to be willing to get past my past baggage around it and I had to have the courage to open up to it again - the courage to continue to move with the energy in whatever way it presents itself- reinventing myself- expanding myself, surrendering to it.  Believe me, before Friday night I really had a sense of dread that came from whatever baggage I had left over. . .but Friday night was simply beautiful and it freed something in me and now I feel I'm in the creative flow again in a way I haven't been in awhile.  Ironically JUST before leaving for our performance my mala broke- I yelled out in despair, Anahata upon hearing me and finding out what was wrong said, "OH, according to the Buddhists that's good luck!  It means a barrier is broken, an obstacle is removed".  So true!!!!  It's amazing how the universe works isn't it???

Saturday was simply joyous- going to the Decatur Arts Festival - connecting with so many beautiful people I know and some who are new to me. .then going to the Pine Lake Memorial Day cookout and beach opening. ..same thing!!!  It was just a glorious day.  Today despite some resistance because I knew I was being inspired to go- I went to the Center for Spiritual Living of Atlanta's 11:30 am service.  And there was a guest speaker- an expert on Aramaic, Hebrew, Coptic- and the original texts of Bible etc.  It's so amazing how much Jesus and his message are distorted through language!!!!  And from taking things out of context- especially the context of the culture . ..and from things literally being taken out and added.  My favorite part of the service was him speaking the Lords Prayer in Aramaic.  It released something in me and I cried- it was so incredibly beautiful.  The timing of this sermon is the most miraculous thing to me though.  I really have been in the process of embracing the fact that Christianity is my religious heritage and that just because I don't agree with many things about Christianity doesn't mean that I need to distance myself from Jesus.  When I got back from India and Nepal, I had a renewed sense of wanting to strengthen my relationship with Jesus and the parts of Christianity I do resonate with- with the New Thought movement- the Gnostics the Christian mystics so to speak.  So it was really amazing that the first "church" service I went to addressed seeing Jesus Christ in a new and more pure light- in seeing the Bible for what it is - separate from the experience of and the relationship with Jesus Christ.  It was a great affirmation for me.  And I am feeling very inspired to learn the song of the Lords Prayer in Aramaic and sharing it as a Pacha Mama.

This Pacha Mama is BACK!!!!!  Hallalujah!  And the Pacha Mama adventure continues in all it's forms

Last of this year's pilgrimage!

This past Sunday Anahata and I had a few friends over and shared slides and shawls from the pilgrimage!  I was reminded when putting together slides how many amazing and beautiful experiences I had some of which I haven't even had the time to really share.  My first priority on the pilgrimage was to make sure Anahata had what she needed to stay as stress free as possible given all the variables at times. AND our days were so full that when I did have down time, I really took it and didn't do much of anything but try and keep up with some emails occasionally.  But believe me the down time was relatively rare and coveted.  I didn't even really shop when I had the chance because it was usually too overwhelming for me!  All that said, I am home and very present as I move into new adventures.  But the time I spent in India and Nepal are forever deeply in my body and very much a part of who I am now.  Someone asked me on Sunday if the pilgrimage felt like a dream. . . . and I said that although my time there was relatively short that it really was deep and intimate and really now feels so much a part of who I am.  This truly was a pilgrimage and wasn't just about running around being a tourist- there were so many great opportunities to really relate, share and connect with people and their spirituality/hearts.  Because I was assisting Anahata I went a week early and got to see some of the inner workings of her life there and her relationships there- this was also the case just simply hanging out with her during the pilgrimage- there was much more association with her point people in each country who were either native or had been there for a very long time.  I consider this association to be a great blessing.

Passang, a Tibetan, was our main help in India and I loved meeting his wife and two children in Dharamasala before the pilgrimage.  What a beautiful family!  And Passang was AMAZING- a true practicing Buddhist with a such a good and light heart.  He really was able to just move through any difficulties that arose with relative grace.  He also like to laugh and have fun and be of service.  He was such a joy to have around.  I look forward to seeing him and his family again next year. . God Willing.

Here is Passang with Sabira Jane discussing one of our vans that was spewing horrible exhaust which later broke down!

Our two main helpers in Nepal were Andrea, an American who has basically been living there for most of her adult life and Pabitra who founded and runs Bright Nepal with Anahata's help and support.
Andrea knew so much about the sacred sights- she was basically our guide most of the time in Nepal.  Pabitra helped alot with the hotel and food logistics and she was present on many of our outings.  Both of these women are extremely generous- but Andrea was the outgoing one and Pabitra the quite force of nature.  Pabitra is the one who decided to name the new girl that had recently joined Bright Nepal, Angela.  I love her especially for that- I felt deeply honored!

Andrea sharing traditional sacred dance with us at a sacred site.  She put her whole heart and soul into her dances.  They were very moving to watch.

Here she is with a monk that showed us around the monastery where her teacher presided before his death.

Pabitra. . .need I say anymore.  This picture epitomizes who she is with all the girls who come to Bright Nepal!!! LOVE

And of course, I would be totally remiss not to make a point in saying how amazing Anahata was. . especially having been privy to all the behind the scenes.  I really know how much of her heart and soul she poured into the success of this pilgrimage. . .how hard and tirelessly she worked.  I really was witness to how huge a heart she has and how incredibly generous she is!!!  I feel a deep gratitude for having been blessed to be a part of her pilgrimage in particular.  BIG thanks and love to Anahata!!!!

One of the first days of our pilgrimage

The last day of the pilgrimage. . .still looking radiant!!!

SO, two weeks have gone by since my arrival home and I've mostly been catching up and doing music therapy gigs.  I think it's time I complete this part of my blog and so I will close with a few more of my favorite pictures/moments from the pilgrimage.  My next blog I will turn my focus to my few days in Europe before coming home and then it's onto my present life which is always full of new adventures!

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The last of India and the first of Nepal!

Okay. ..I just posted. . .but I looked at my blog and realized I need to back track just a little for now.  Next post will have the LAST of my favorite photos of this journey before totally moving on to new territory, adventures and journeys!!!  (Check the blog I did earlier tonight if you want to read more of my thoughts and not just look at pictures!)

Sol Pema (sp?) our last big stop in India.  I slept better here than any where else in India despite a very hard bed.

The view from our hotel window

The dances up on the temple grounds (the one you see in the previous two pictures!)

Yes, this is wild marijuana.  One of the vans broke down by a huge field of it just off the road.  And I actually had to go pee in the middle of it. . .I found this particularly funny. . something I will NEVER forget.

Arriving in Nepal

One of our first trips was way up a hill overlooking Khatmandu valley- to a famous stuppa.

Getting ready to have our prayer flags hung.

Our prayer flags are hung on the hill with hundreds of others

Enjoying a picnic lunch!

Feeling So At Home in the World

Well, I'm home and it feels good after 5 weeks although I've been really wanting to go to sleep all evening due to jet lag.  So I'm at the neighborhood hangout, New Era Cafe (run by a beautiful Ethiopian couple) for an avocado smoothie (dinner) and to do a little "work" on the computer.  The mayor walked in a couple of minutes ago and we had a great conversation about the latest progress in Pine Lake as well as how my trip went and how Aiden is doing.  I do love living in this community!

I  just wanted to sort of complete some of my thoughts on my journey over the past 5 weeks.  In general, I feel this overwhelming sense of grace and gratitude around the whole thing.  It was a leap of faith to leave for as long as I did but I knew in my soul it was the "right" thing for me.  It has been an amazing and transformative journey and, honestly, I don't quite have the words for it.  I'm just so grateful for the beauty of it- for the magic, the miracles, the relationships developed, the huge amount of love felt.  I'm so blessed to walk back into my life here with no problems- and with lots of contract work to make up for the time gone.  I wasn't sure what was going to happen with that when I left.  Thank you God!

Really, I feel this renewed sense of life- a passion for life.  And, I feel like I've found a real tangible way that I can give back some of the abundance that I experience in my life (supporting the girls hostel, Bright Nepal).  I love what this organization is doing.  I love Pabitra, the amazing woman who runs it.  I love the girls.  I love the fact that I now have a personal relationship with this organization which I will continue to nurture.  I know I will be back in Nepal sooner than later!

I love the Tibetans and their beautiful way of life even as refugees.  I love their practice of Buddhism.  I love that the Dalai Lama encourages Westerners to continue following the example of Jesus Christ.  I have felt a profound renewal in my own faith and in my own spiritual practice because of my experience with Hindu and Buddhist practitioners, holy sites and temples.  I was inspired by these experiences in many different ways for many different reasons.

That's it in a nutshell!!!  And to further complete. .  (poo I didn't bring the right memory card so here's just a few of the pictures I was going to post.. .more later!)

Atisha School (sp?) boys getting ready to do a traditional dance for us.  This school is for the Tibetan refugee children in Nepal.  The refugee community lives across the street.  

The school welcomes us as their honored guests.

Performing a traditional dance for us. 

The elder Tibetan women perform traditional songs and dance for us as well.

Dances of Universal Peace with the children

The computer lab at this school is completely outdated.  The school is trying to raise $3500 to upgrade everything.  We were able to give them about $1000 toward this endeavor.  If anyone wants to make a tax deductible donation towards this cause OR if anyone wants to ship laptops to the school, please contact me!! THANKS

In Bhaktapur, Nepal

Same. ..having enjoyed lunch at a roof top cafe.  If it weren't so hazy you would be able to see the snow peaked Himalayans in the distance.  They surrounded the Khatmandu valley of course!

More Bright Nepal

Here are some pictures of the girls at Bright Nepal.  The day we visited they put on a little concert for us and then we danced and sang with them.  It was one of my favorite days of the pilgrimage.

After the girls did a group performance of songs and dance, individual girls got up and shared contemporary Nepali songs with traditional dance.  One girl did a karate demonstration.  It was a beautiful, spontaneous sharing.  And it was fun to see the girls encouraging each other to take turns individually.

Dances of Universal Peace with the girls.

My namesake, 7 year old Angela, who just joined Bright Nepal one week earlier is front and center.  The girls all dressed in their traditional costumes and performed for us.  So unbelievably CUTE!

Tibetan Children's Village

I'm in the Delhi airport, waiting for my flight to Amsterdam via Paris.  So I'd like to share again. .  going back to Dharmasala, India where we visited the Tibetan Children's Village (TCV) and shared the Dances of Universal peace with a few hundred of the approximately 1500 kids there!   TCV is a non-profit, charitable institution for the care and education of orphaned and destitute Tibetan children in exile.
"The Chinese occupation of Tibet in 1959 led to the mass genocide of the Tibetan people.  Over 1 million Tibetans died.  In the aftermath, around 100,000 refugees followed His Holiness the Dalai Lama into exile.  Among them were thousands of orphans and destitute children ravaged by war, hunger and the psychological devastation of losing their families, homes and country.. . .Tibetans continue to flee persecution in their homeland (to this day!).  Parents still feel compelled to give up their children by the pervasive sense of hopelessness in Tibet, where educational opportunities for Tibetan children is extremely poor."

The Dalai Lama initially proposed the creation of "Nursery for Tibetan Refugee Children"  which expanded under the direction of his younger sister Mrs. Jetsun Pema eventually becoming TCV.

"Today, the TCV head office is managing 5 children's villages, 7 residential schools, 6 day schools, 9 day care centers, 3 vocational training centers, a further studies scholarship program, an outreach sponsorship program and the Dalai Lama Institute for Higher Education, reaching out to over 16,000 Tibetan children and youths in exile." (From a brochure I got when I visited the village in Dharamsala).

Passang, our guide in India, was orphaned and raised by TCV and has become the head of their handicraft centers.  He is an amazing example of the beauty of this system in restoring a sense of family and culture to these refugee children.  He is one of the most beautiful people I have met and a devote Buddhist who takes his practice very seriously waking up every morning at 5 am - including yoga into his practice and a very healthy diet.   He is a person of amazing integrity and joyful spirit.  I was inspired by him and by the Tibetan refugees in general.

The village was AMAZING.  . .schooling 1500 kids from preschool through high school and boarding close to 1,000 in houses with house mothers.   The grounds were neat, clean and simple and made me wish we lived more like this. . .in simple community.  They don't have many things but they have what they need and are surrounded by natural beauty.   I was very impressed by what the Tibetans have managed to do as refugees. . .of course with the help and support of the Dalai Lama.  Many of them, I believe are shining examples to the world.  I'm so grateful for them holding up the vibration of the planet in general- helping to keep things in balance energetically.  I really have come to believe this and I believe much of it has to do with their Buddhist practice.  May we all learn from the way many of them are living their lives!

Brazilian Sylvia interacting with a preschool child at TCV.  Notice the neat uniform!

Being given a tour of the school.

This is one of the many boarding houses for about 20 kids- each with a house mother.

Dances of Universal Peace with the students (Brazilian Cecilia) 

Dancing with the kids

Another view of the the school (Australian pilgrim, Maria- Eleni)